Wednesday, 16 November 2016

Taken for granted: loos (graphic warning)

The biggest surprises when travelling aren't people, sights, tastes etc. They are when your day-to-day reference points crumble.

This is the first of a series on this theme, and we will start with loos. In this instance I speak only for the Ladies (except - you have been warned - the last photo!).

1. No loo paper
Seatless + stinky bin
Not the greatest shock, this can happen in the UK, but still a shock. Men, this is why women have handbags. You think they are full of junk but in actual fact we keep a month's supply of loo rolls in there.

2. You aren't allowed to put the loo paper down the pan
Again, not exceptional. But when in a reflex reaction you have broken the rule, and not fed the stinky bin, what do you do next?(!)

3. No toilet seat
In a French campsite toilet block there were signs on the doors indicating the ones without seats. Being the sophisticate that I am I naturally veered to a seat-equipped cubicle to discover that they meant the toilet has a rim, not a seat. Who, intentionally, sits on the rim? On the plus side the skiing pose must be doing good things for my thighs.

No paper + wet floor
4. No lock on the door
Why have a lock for goodness sake? Doesn't everybody do the same thing in there, what's all the embarrassment about?

 Regardless, I class the toilet cubicle as private space and prefer to keep it that way. This isn't too big a deal if the cubicle is small and you have a seat to sit on: you can lodge your foot against the door. More stressful is when there is only one unisex toilet and the door is sprinting distance from the pan.

5. Mystery wet floor
What is that? Has water leaked from the cistern? From the toilet bowl? Is that water? ..... Time for a different cubicle, if there is one.

6. All the above
This configuration happens when you are truly desperate and all other toilet options have failed. You have no choice other than to adopt an advanced yoga pose to keep your foot on the door, get the tissues out of your bag and minimise contact with the toilet rim, and the floor, and the stinky bin.

7. Beyond contemplation
The below was in a church in the Men's.

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1 comment:

  1. Lol... I never thought I'd pray for the dave shower shot in preference to any other photo, but you pulled that one out of the bag! Hopefully not literally.... anyway not indulging this base talk no more. Keep em coming...posts not poos